Monday, February 13, 2012

Why Whitney's Passing Saddens Me So...

Some things you will always remember like your first kiss, your first love, really your first anything. Whitney's passing touches me so because for me she was my first. She was my first love of music memory. In 1985, I was five years old (going on six) and I remember falling in love with "I Wanna With Somebody" watching Whitney dance around (even though we all know Whitney couldn't dance) that 80's set with big, blonde hair smiling, giggling, and just having a great time. I thought, how beautiful, how talented and even though at the time I had no idea what any of those grown up songs meant somehow they touched me.

Many have come after Whitney and we often compared them Mariah, Toni, Jennifer but no one compares to the Queen of 80's, 90's and early 2000's Pop/R&B. I mean she was married to the "King of R&B", Bobby Brown, for goodness sake. Now, who can top that?

She shared her happiest life moments with us; her wedding to Bobby. Who doesn't remember the picture of them and she had that white jeweled headpiece on, which at the time I thought was kinda of ugly. Her discussing her miscarriage openly with us during that 1993 Barbara Walters interview. There was the "I'm Every Woman" video where she was pregnant with Bobbi Kristina and never looked more beautiful. The moments go on and on for me.

I know in recent years, her cookoo crazy overwhelmed her amazing talent but you can't say she wasn't entertaining. I mean standing on stage declaring Bobby as "The King of R&B", going off on Wendy Williams during that infamous interview, and less not forget the show that I could not stop watching "Being Bobby Brown.”Just shut up, shut up, shut up" while singing The Black Eyed Peas. Oh my goodness she brought laughter.

Over the weekend, I was trying to connect my emotions to my I'm saddened and surprised but not shocked. I'm saddened because I, as with everyone else, had great hope for Whitney that she would take time, free herself from her addiction, and continue to contribute to the soundtrack of our lives. While her last album was not the greatest Whitney album and many critiqued her voice, I still had some jams like "Million Dollar Bill" and "Worth It". Honestly, a bad Whitney album is still just as good as a Rihanna-like album. Also, I had such an anticipation for her upcoming movie roles in "Sparkle" & "Waiting to Exhale 2- Getting Back to Happy" (unnamed) reprising her role as Savannah.

I am so utterly sad for her family but especially Bobbi Kristina. I keep thinking about Bobbi Kristina being a young lady having to cope with the tragic loss of her mother. Knowing the genetic disposition she has to addiction, I am praying and hoping that she makes better decisions for her life when managing life's stressor rather they be good or bad. As awful as this may sound, I want Bobbi Kristina to really grieve the loss of her mom without the aid of sedatives. Grief is a normal process. I mean really feeling the emotions and thoughts and finding healthy ways to cope. Once you begin to numb the pain with your drug of choice, you become addicted and the numbing because more normal as opposed to the real normal reaction of grieving. I pray she has a strong support system covering and protecting her for the life journey she has ahead along with a strong, meaningful relationship with God.

I would like to get across the message of NO JUDGMENT. Yes, we have all made our comments about the way she and others have lived there lives but I think we forget that we all have our vices or things in our life we don't manage well. We think that if you are addicted to anything that it's a life choice and not a disease so we pass judgment. However, addiction is a disease; like other diseases when gone undiagnosed, untreated, and unmanaged leads to a tragic end. Let this be a lesson to us all to lead better, healthier lives. Check yourself before you check someone else.

Let’s reflect on and celebrate her life!


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